Do You Tell Your Team to Rest While You Work Until 10 PM?

To the HR professionals promoting workplace wellbeing while on Slack until 10 PM…I see you. I was you.

To the Talent Development professionals and facilitators who give workshop attendees breaks but work through your own…I see you. I was you.

To the leaders telling teams to take time off and honor boundaries while ignoring your own…I see you. I was you.

I could go on, but you get the picture. We tell those we support in the workplace one thing but do another ourselves.

How can we expect to lead, support, and develop others when we're depleted, running on fumes, can't think straight?

Plus, what example are we setting? When we preach boundaries but ignore our own, when we promote wellbeing while staying on Slack until 10 PM…our teams and employees see that. They learn that the real rule is: say one thing, do another. That taking care of yourself is something you tell other people to do, not something you actually do.

You can keep this up for a while. But it's not sustainable. Think I'm kidding? I'm not.

I was the strong one, the one who could get anything done, the project leader and go-to person… until I wasn't. Until I left everything behind thinking I just needed a change of pace. I didn't need that. I needed to stop.

I phoned in my life after I left corporate behind. Sure, I started a business, but I didn't do anything with it. I was like a pinball getting knocked around a machine, wandering aimlessly from task to task but not really doing anything.

Why share all of this? Because it's a pattern I'm seeing repeated far too often.

• But I love my job! So did I.

• But if I don't do it, no one else will! Is that really true? And if it is, you've got bigger problems.

• But if I don't respond quickly, they'll think… What? What will they think? Me? I trained people that I'd respond quickly.

I was overextended and hyperconnected and losing the most important relationship—the one with myself.

This isn't a solution article. It's a nudge. Or a wake-up call if you need it.

Something's gotta give. Do you want it to be you?

Maybe this end-of-year rush you give yourself a gift.

Maybe you:

• Set a boundary and honor it:

  • Log off from work at a reasonable hour and don't log back in

  • Don't check email between back-to-back meetings. Stand, stretch, breathe. (But they… nope. If it's a real emergency, they know how to reach you—yes, I see you with your laptop, work phone, and personal cell)

  • Take a lunch break without screens, even if it's just for a few minutes

• Plan time for you during the week:

  • Block time on your calendar and do something you enjoy.

  • I have an HR friend who loves puzzle games on her computer. It brings her joy. A Talent Development professional I know colors during breaks. What brings you joy?

Just remember this….Your work matters. Your people matter. And you matter too.

And if you're reading this and thinking "that's me"—you're not alone in figuring this out. I work with leaders, entrepreneurs and other busy professionals who are ready to stop talking about wellness and start actually living it. Let's talk.

What boundary would make the biggest difference for you right now?