Shedding Light on the SolsticeJune 19, 2023
Lately, I’ve been experiencing quite a bit of resistance in my own life. I’m sure you’ve experienced it too. It’s when that voice inside of you is telling you to hold back. It may be because it’s new and unknown or because it’s triggering deep seated fears within you.
Here are a few examples from my own life:
- I procrastinate doing something that I KNOW will help me achieve my dream
- Cue the fear of the unknown. I’d rather do something really hard than step into the unknown
- I think – surely someone isn’t going to want to read that!
- Cue the fear of not being good enough
- I wonder if this is the right direction for me and keep wondering and overthinking
- Hello fear of the unknown again!
What does it feel like? It doesn’t feel bad – it just feels like a caution sign. It feels sludgy (yes, that’s a word!) like I’m trying to trek through deep mud on the trail. It feels hard. Sometimes, it feels like me, as a small child, being pulled into something while digging my heals in and screaming, no, no, no, no, NO!
But, as I look to nature, I’m inspired that resistance doesn’t necessarily mean WARNING or NO! It simply is a signpost. It may mean stop, change direction or continue forward knowing that it may or may not turn out how we thought it would. It may even be something better.
Here’s a recent example from nature – a tree with a curve in it’s trunk (pictured above).
I spent quite a while just staring at that tree – marveling at how it looked, wondering how it grew that way and taking picture after picture. It’s not how it was supposed to grow and it could have stopped but it grew anyways. Most likely, it was seeking the sun as it was growing. And, I have to say, it’s way more cool and interesting shaped like this than just growing straight up and down.
So, as I sit with my own resistance, I consider what it’s trying to tell me. It may be:
- Testing me to see if this is what I really want.
- Helping me to see this in a new light
- Encouraging a new/different direction
When is resistance just resistance and when is it truly a flashing warning sign?
That, for me, was the hardest to discern. I found that the best way to identify if its resistance or my intuition warning me of danger was to sit in silence after asking – is this what I really want? Does it align with my values? Does it help me to achieve the things that give me a sense of meaning and purpose? And, if I feel, deep down, that it is, then I know it’s simply resistance.
What does resistance look like for you?